Thursday, March 4, 2010

If myzus persicae were elected, would he combat the healthcare crisis?

Gosh good heavens and ello ello. It has been over a week since my last confes-er, blog. Has much happened in the intervening hours betwixt musings? Not really. Actually, I sell myself short. I started the week in a blaze of flaxen discontent and apathy and gradually gathered momentum to finish on a reasonable note if such a thing exists. I have collected a generous assortment of articles on GDE which puts a hole in my previous theory that little if any existed. In my defence, many of these articles have appeared post-assertion, so I can't be too hard on me. I'm feeling a bit stream of consciousness-y.

In addition to an earlier line of thought (much earlier), what if aphids suddenly gained the intellectual capacity to form a government? What effect would the addition of this literal dot on the political landscape have on state or even federal affairs? Admittedly, being somewhere in the range of 1 to 3 millimetres in length, an aphid government's geopolitical clout is somewhat diminished.

They might govern over an area the size of a Royal Doulton pin dish with tiny bureaucratic efficiency and brandish a rapid policy cycle, but would surely suffer numerous ill effects; that of governance over a largely transient population; said population is partially composed of constituents many times their size and with a potential interest in ingesting candidates regardless of election promises; they are aphids. Despite these potential drawbacks, the notion of an aphid government bears analysis up to a point. Beyond that, the idea is revealed to be pretty fucking ridiculous. Where would you get cameras small enough for the press conferences? Rallies would be held in thimbles, it'd be madness. Absolve me fadda.

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